Old Red Cow

Holy cow! Another pub nicely taking part in the community scheme. That’s nice for our bladders that is.

Monday – Thursday: 12.00am – 11.00pm
Friday & Saturday: 12.00am – 12.00pm
Sunday: 12.00am – 10.30pm


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledNo, sorry…

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 No, sorry baby

doctor loo sad poopPoop-unfriendly
(With only two cubicles for the whole pub, this could be tricky)

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Butchers Hook & Cleaver

Walking past Smithfield Market?

No need to butcher your bladder… Here’s a lovely place for a pee.

Weekdays: 11:00 am – 11:00 pm
Weekends: closed


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo happy poopPoop-friendly
(With proper doors and a few cubicles available, you’ll find it easy to poop away)

Hamley’s

Kid’s stores were the best places in the world when you were little. Heck, they still are. Just because they have free toilets.

Weekdays: 10.00 am – 09.00 pm
Saturdays: 09.30 am – 09.00 pm
Sundays: 12.00 am – 06.00 pm


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible
(Toilets on the 5th floor)

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo sad poopPoop-unfriendly
(With the amount of kids running around I’ll doubt you’ll be able to find the peace, quiet and amount of paper required)

Southbank Centre

We Londoners love the Southbank. Even with the tourists, the seagulls and the awful choice of food, we do still hang there, just because we love the Thames.

However looking for somewhere to pee can be quite difficult.
But don’t worry people, because I’ve got you’re back…

10.00am – 11.00pm


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo happy poopPoop-friendly
(Go up a few floors where there’s less queue and a bit more peace and quiet)

The Museum of the Order of St John

The order of St-John’s provides first aid and care in the community. That’s probably why they let you access the museum toilets free of charge… Happy bladders!

Monday – Saturday: 10.00am – 05.00pm
Sunday: 10.00am – 05.00pm (July, August, September only)


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: very likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo happy poopPoop-friendly
(With the museum being very quiet and the cubicles having proper doors and being modern and very clean, this is a little poop heaven right there)

Centrale – Croydon

Some people like to take the piss out of Croydon.
Well I say, piss-wise, this place is actually quite good. Hello Croydon, I love your numerous toilets!

Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday: 10.00 am – 06.30 pm
Thursday: 10.00 am – 08.30 pm
Friday: 10.00 am – 07.00 pm
Saturday: 09.00 am – 07.00 pm
Sunday: 11.00 am – 05.00 pm


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo happy poopPoop-friendly
(As always, head to the quieter levels for more peace, more quiet, more paper)

BFI

Ever wanted to pee in the middle of the movie? Yeah, I’ve been there too!

But as much as I want to hold it in when I’m watching the new James Bond, I’ll gladly enjoy the toilets at the BFI when I’m strolling down the Southbank and my bladder starts playing up.

Monday – Thursday: 11.00am – 11.00pm
Friday & Saturday: 11.00am – 11.30pm
Sunday: 11.00am – 11.00pm
(Some parts of the venue have slightly irregular times)


doctor loo rollChances of toilet paper: likely

doctor loo disabledAccessible

flat,1000x1000,075,f.u3 Baby-changing facilities

doctor loo happy poopPoop-friendly
(There are few quieter areas you can poop in peace)